Category Archives: Jewish Memorial Traditions

 

Why Pre-Order a Jewish Family Monument?

For many families, resting close to loved ones is significant. This arrangement offers families the opportunity to journey into the afterlife together, and rest eternally with each other.

Convenient Visitation

Ordering a Jewish family monument offers family members and friends convenient visitation. Instead of visiting several sites or cemeteries, families can have one reflective experience while paying respects.

Religious Reasons

Jewish scripture emphasizes the importance of family, especially during the difficult time of mourning. The entire grieving, burial, and shiva process relies on the support and care of family members. While not a requirement, Jews traditionally rest among family. Purchasing a Jewish family monument allows people to rest together eternally.

 

Types of Jewish Family Monuments

Depending on the size of the family, there are several different types of Jewish family monuments available. Our Jewish monument artists can create unique and customized headstones, regardless of the complexity’s request.

Family Headstone

Larger headstones can be placed in a burial plot to indicate the place of several members of a family. These larger Jewish memorials are easier to notice as people walk through the cemetery.

Often, family headstones are accompanied by individual footstones. These footstones, or footmarkers, generally list individual details like name, dates, and more.

Double Headstone

Double headstones are a more common option than family headstones, as they are for couples. This burial is a testament to the love and joyous occasions shared through life. Double headstones are often a more economical choice than individual upright memorials, too.

Being buried with a bashert ensures a shared eternal resting place.

How do Family Monuments Work?

While some family monuments are designed to feature minimal details, like the last name, this is not always the case. Others can have detailed inscriptions for each member of the family. Additional details can be easily added later on, without the monument being removed, by a monument artist.

As we all know, a loved one’s death usually leaves us with an extensive list of responsibilities to attend to. Often, the number of tasks can feel insurmountable and overwhelming. At Fox Monuments, we understand how difficult this particular moment is. Therefore, we do all in our power to make the process of acquiring a Jewish monument stress-free, painless and even rewarding. Our multi-decade work with Long Island’s Jewish community proves our enduring respect for the Jewish faith. Over the years, our craftsmen have produced countless breathtaking Jewish monuments. We work closely with families to craft headstones with inscriptions that symbolize legacies, faith and love.

Of course, one of the fundamental aspects of losing a loved one is writing an obituary for the deceased. Amidst the grief, pressure and countless obligations, it can be easy to overlook or compromise. However, this is truthfully one of the variables in this process that deserves serious attention, focus and conscious thought. The obituary is your opportunity to inform the community, friends and family of their passing, explain what happened, share service details and honor their memory. You can have the funeral home post the obituary on their website, share it on social media platforms and  anywhere else it might be relevant. 

In this post, we’ll discuss the obituary, the writing process, list tips on how you can enhance it and what makes it so important. 

 

1. Look for Examples that You Like

Of course, for such an important document, we want to include absolutely everything that made them incredible and omit nothing at all. However, it’s definitely best to alleviate some of that pressure from your shoulders. It’s great that you want to do right by them. But it’s impossible to artfully describe absolutely every moment of their lives and every facet of their character in one brief obituary. 

A smart way to get some inspiration or guidance is to read examples of other obituaries. You can figure out how to refine your tone, see what they acknowledge and get a general sense of similarities between several different obituaries. Browse the funeral home’s website, newspapers or ask any relevant professionals for notable examples you should emulate.   

This is the best way to begin the process swiftly and with a sense of confidence. 

2. Make A List of Elements to Include

Of course, the obituary can consist of whatever you like. But there are obviously certain details that you’ll consider of tremendous importance and others you can afford to omit. Therefore, you should keep a list of anything that may come to mind spontaneously and when you least expect it. 

Also, you can ask any professionals to give you a list of the traditional things that go into obituaries. Keeping a record of these elements will help you feel a lot more confident in the final draft before you post it.

                 

3. Monitor The Length 

Again: we know that you want to honor the person you lost with this obituary. However, a colossal narrative is definitely not an ideal obituary. Basically, the central purpose is to be a brief summary of somebody’s life. Also, don’t forget that anything you put in a newspaper will have a price based on length. 

If you want to honor them with an extensive, written celebration of their life and legacy, you can save it for their eulogy. Then you can deliver it to friends and family at the burial service. Ultimately, when composing the obituary, the relevant details and a concise amount of personal comments will be perfectly sufficient. 

  

Conclusion

Our mission is to help you honor your loved ones in every way possible. Of course, our primary focus is on crafting a one-of-a-kind monument that is the perfect, enduring celebration of their life. In addition, our commitment to providing you with strength and support is an essential part of our mission, as well. We know what a difficult time this is for all who must endure it. Therefore, we’ll continue working on your behalf to alleviate some of the stress, difficulty and pain and deliver a Jewish monument worthy of your loved one.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

 

The Jewish faith is rich with history, tradition and specific customs. Every religion has their own, singular viewpoints on the topics of death, grieving and memorializing those who pass away. And, Judaism is no exception. As an ancient, prominent world religion, Judaism’s end-of-life and mourning practices have been passed on through countless generations. From placing stones to Shiva, millions recognize these practices all over the world.

At Fox Monuments, we’ve been serving Long Island’s Jewish community for decades. Therefore, we’ve been providing monuments which honor the lives of Jewish people while paying equal tribute to their lifelong faith. Without a doubt, one of the most noble Jewish traditions in the aftermath of one’s passing is Tzedakah, or “righteous giving.” In this post, we’ll explore Tzedakah, what it entails and how the Jewish people apply this tradition to make something good out of something painful.

Tzedakah: Righteous Giving

Jewish tradition views charity as the greatest force in the universe, stronger than death itself. Therefore, the act of giving selflessly is a means of almost counteracting someone’s death. Contributing time, money or goods to anyone in need keeps them alive, in a sense.

By contributing to charities or organizations they cared deeply for in life, they’re making their memory a tangible force in the world. In fact, many Jews view Tzedakah as a way to become the voice of the deceased on earth.

Donating Money

Of course, countless Jewish mourners make monetary donations to causes and organizations that reflect the values and beliefs of whoever they lost. Obvi­ously, someone who was a volunteer or contributor to the United Jewish Appeal or the American Cancer Society, would be honored with donations to these causes.

On the other hand, others may choose to honor a passionate, lifelong reader by supporting the synagogue library, the local public library or literacy programs. Ultimately, mourners select their donations by reflecting on the morals and ideals of those they lost.

Giving More Than Money

Obviously, when it comes to giving, Tzedakah doesn’t limit mourners to monetary donations only. In fact, many choose to honor whoever they lost by donating their time and effort to support charitable causes or community service programs. However, Tzedakah can also include much smaller gestures of kindness.

To honor someone you lost, you can volunteer for a few days or work in a soup kitchen. But also, you can do something as simple as cooking a meal for an elderly neighbor or walking their dog. Any gesture of kindness counts when it comes to Tzedakah. Ultimately, the most important thing is to give selflessly to honor whoever you lost. This is a means of preserving their memory on earth through a noble and caring act.

Conclusion – Fox Monuments

Of course, no charitable gesture is ever wasted. Tzedakah gives Jewish mourners an opportunity to create something special, kind and meaningful out of something tragic. In addition, it encourages us to honor our loved ones by doing something beneficial for those in need.

At Fox Monuments, we’ll continue to serve Long Island’s Jewish community by crafting gorgeous, enduring custom headstones that honor the Jewish faith. We’ll also continue to help uphold any and all Jewish traditions concerning funerals and mourning, from the Unveiling Ceremony to Tzedakah and more.

Followers of the Jewish faith place significant sentimental value on both human life and, in particular: family. When a family member passes away, a swift, decisive reaction is critical. Of course, it’s equally as essential to pre-plan or commission a Jewish monument quickly. However, often the family won’t uncover the monument until the Yahrzeit (Unveiling Ceremony). One key Jewish burial tradition is burying the body quickly, and beginning the grieving process.

The tradition of guarding the body is synonymous with this principle. In this post, we’ll explore this ancient tradition, its origins and how mourners honor it in modern times.

 

What is Shemira?

Shemira translates directly to “watching” or “guarding.” Essentially, it’s the traditional Jewish practice of observing and protecting the deceased’s body and one of the first mourning stages. Ultimately, this serves a dual purpose. First, it helps family members to feel at ease about the conditions of their relatives. In addition, it serves as a way to comfort the spirit of the deceased. Ultimately, the goal of Shemira is to ensure that the body remains undisturbed. With few exceptions, Orthodox Jews are the only people who continue to observe this tradition these days.

In the most traditional circles, someone must guard the body until burial. This is the same guiding principle which governs the practice of immediate burials. The longer the body remains outside of a burial ground, the more potential there is for illicit tampering. Of course, this is the primary reason that Jewish law enforces the policy of informing family members about death promptly; and laying the body to rest with the Jewish monument.

 

What is the Origin of Shemira?

Shemira is an ancient practice, and dates back at least two-thousand years. Originally, this practice was a show of solemn respect for the deceased. Before progressing to thee next life, the Jewish faith dictates that the soul temporarily remains around the body. But, there were several additional goals of this practice, as well.

During the earliest days of Shemira, this was a method of repelling critters and thieves. In modern times, we’re a lot less likely to deal with people attempting to tamper with the body or animals infiltrating the facility. However, the sentiment behind this practice remains just as essential to honoring mourners’ faith as ever.

 

Shomer: Guardian or Watcher

The Hebrew word shomer is not specific to death, either. This word translates to “watch,” “guard,” or “preserve.” It’s entirely possibly to apply this word towards other contexts, as well.

For example, people who follow Kosher dietary standards are called shomer kashrut. People who are shomer Shabbat agree to observe the strict rules of the Sabbath. Within this religious context, shomer means “one who guards the dead.”

Who Can be a Shomer?

Because the family’s in a state of high mourning, the Jewish faith calls for others to honor these guard duties.

Most shomers are from either the congregation or a chevra kadisha. A chevra kadisha is an organization specifically ordained to prepare and comfort bodies of the deceased. With this practice in place, someone who was significantly close to the deceased can stand guard over them following their passing.

Throughout the vigilance period, shomers must stand guard over the body of the deceased. This means that they must remain awake throughout the night. Shomers cannot eat, drink or indulge in other pleasures that are impossible for the deceased to enjoy. Often, the shomer recites psalms or other important readings.

 

Jewish Monuments Long Island

At Fox Monuments, we pride ourselves on creating the highest quality Jewish monuments available on Long Island. Our team of expert craftsmen have an extreme attention to detail and an unwavering commitment to creating monuments that pay exquisite homage to the Jewish faith. With a firsthand knowledge of Jewish burial customs, we can create a lasting and significant memorial that beautifully honors your faith and legacy.

Fox Monuments has proudly served Long Island’s Jewish community for decades. We continuously work hard to provide guidance, support and compassion during exceptionally difficult times of grief. Of course, we’ve done our very best to honor the numerous Jewish customs and traditions surrounding death and burial.

Within the history of the Jewish faith, there are many guidelines surrounding the appropriate response to a loved one’s death. Some of these traditions concern the burial process. Others concern the Jewish headstone unveiling with beautifully-inscribed symbols. However, Jewish people also adhere to a mourning process divided into stages. Usually, we refer to them as the “Stages of Mourning.”

In this post, we’ll provide some general tips on finding strength and support during each specific phase of the mourning process.

Aninut: The First Stage

During this early phase of the mourning process, you’ll very likely feel numb disbelief. Many mourners in this stage simply find the loss hard to believe. In fact, the first stage of mourning is very often characterized by shock and an inability to process the reality of the loss.

During this stage, Jewish tradition encourages us to try and confront and acknowledge any feelings of grief or despair we may feel. There are no expectations on Jewish mourners during this phase. Specifically, this means that mourners generally are not expected to say blessings or engage in daily prayers. Their primary focus should, essentially, be on planning the funeral and giving their loved one the most honorable farewell possible.

But above all, this stage’s most important step is one coming to terms with the painful reality of their loss. Within Judaism, the holy texts acknowledge that we can’t exorcise the pain while our departed loved one remains before us.

Shiva: The Second Stage

Of course, shiva is an integral aspect of not only Jewish mourning, but the Jewish faith as a whole. To this day, it remains a definitive practice and an essential way for mourners to process their grief and receive the support they need from friends and family.

Sitting shiva enables you to pause, reflect, and allow the reality of your loss to resonate properly. Throughout shiva, close family generally remain at home as a steady stream of friends and family visit to pay their respects. An essential step throughout this stage is to talk openly about the deceased. Specifically, discussing the impact of the death, the days and weeks directly before it, as well as fond memories and reflections of your time together. This actually has an unexpected benefit: revisiting this narrative repeatedly will make the reality of their loss resonate faster. And while this is painful, this is actually integral to the healing process.

Shloshim: The Third Stage

Following shiva, custom dictates that we should take a brief walk outside. This, in effect, represents our reintegration into society. Additionally, a short stroll outdoors is an effective transition into Shloshim, the next three weeks. Of course, there is, more often than not, lingering feelings of grief and despair. However, the severity of our bereavement usually begins to slowly dissipate and become less intense. It’s important to remember that it’s very normal to still feel sad and very emotional during this stage.

Also, keep in mind that just because the first couple of stages of mourning are over, that doesn’t eliminate our need to cope. Keep reaching out to friends and family for support whenever you feel the need to.

Yahrzeit: The Fourth Stage

Traditionally, the “official” mourning process concludes with Shloshim. And for those mourning their mother or father, usually the process persists for another ten months.

Of course, losing a parent isn’t the only kind of loss that will leave an enduring emotional effect. And nobody expects you to be “done mourning” in thirty days. Truthfully, the entire first year can be exceptionally difficult and emotionally turbulent. It often becomes a lot more challenging as we try to cope with the consistent demands of our lives. Creating unique mourning rituals can help us heal from any lingering heartache.

Don’t feel “wrong” if your pain continues throughout the year, particularly on holidays or birthdays. Continue reaching out to friends for support. Also, just because some days are less challenging doesn’t mean there won’t be more difficult days. Healing from a painful loss isn’t a straight line and everyone recovers differently.

Conclusion – Fox Monuments

At Fox Monuments, our primary goal has always been to provide as much comfort to mourning families as we can. We make every effort to remain respectful to and considerate of the grieving process as you order your Jewish headstone.

We take great pride in helping families through difficult times, and with minimal stress. Contact us to learn more about how we can craft a beautiful monument for your loved one.

At Fox Monuments, crafting memorials that reflect legacies and honor faith is our contribution to Long Island’s Jewish community. Judaism is a faith rich with countless customs and traditions. Of course, there are numerous customs and traditions surrounding death and healing from it. Unfortunately, within the previous year honoring each of these traditions has been difficult. And with so many lives lost from COVID-19, it’s been doubly difficult for so many families.

However, with these restrictions came a certain amount of innovation. Obviously, we couldn’t gather in large numbers or visit many public spaces. Therefore, traditional rituals weren’t an option. As a result, countless families developed their own, personal mourning rituals to honor their loved ones. In this post, we’ll explore a guide to creating new mourning rituals that can provide closure and feel like a respectable tribute to those we’ve lost.

What Is a Ritual?

Obviously, this is the best place to start. Admittedly, this may seem like a pointless question to ask. However, knowing what you should strive towards is a great way to understand what to do. When it comes to saying a final goodbye, you can never put forth too much effort.

Rituals are actions done in significant ways that represent an ideal that’s much more than the act itself. Actions that symbolize ideas, thoughts, beliefs or metaphysical notions are legitimate rituals. Basically, they give a meaning to our actions. Also, they give us the feeling that we’re connected with something greater than ourselves.

Often, we perform rituals in an effort to obtain peace, clarity, meaning or to feel grounded. Sometimes, we perform rituals to connect to family or a specific individual, or culture, society, our ancestors or even ourselves.

Creating Your Own Ritual

We may create rituals for a number of reasons. But in this case, the goal is to create a ritual that allows you to process grief in a constructive, healthy way. Many decide to perform them on a birthday or anniversary significant to someone they’ve lost. On the other hand, some express grief in subtle, quieter rituals every day or week.

Of course, a mourning ritual should, in some way, reflect whoever you lost. Basically, this means you should include a symbol or memento with significance to them. Just like a headstone inscription, this will encourage the notion that you’re honoring them.

If you have any concerns about a ritual potentially violating your faith, consult your rabbi. However, typical mourning rituals have no blasphemous value and are simply a more personal means of saying goodbye to a loved one. In addition, they provide closure during a time when we can’t observe many normal traditions like Shiva.

Examples of Mourning Rituals

• Light a candle in their honor, perhaps on a certain date like Hanukkah. For example, a common ritual is to light candles at dinnertime to signify past meals shared.
• Create a scrapbook and actively work towards filling it with photos and mementos symbolizing their life.
• Recite poetry, important readings or song lyrics.
• Listen to their favorite songs regularly or create a mix of their favorite musicians.
• Watch their favorite movie or TV show.
• Plant a tree or flowers in their memory.
• Make a donation to their favorite charity in their name/memory.
• Create a work of art symbolic of their life.

Ultimately, there are no rules or restrictions when it comes to an effective mourning ritual. Of course, you know precisely what kind of actions will properly honor your loved one. It can be as simple or extravagant as you like, whatever feels most appropriate. Basically, if it feels like a legitimate way to honor them, then it most likely is. Do whatever feels right.

Conclusion – Fox Monuments

Without a doubt, the previous year was full of unique challenges and difficult circumstances. As a result, countless families were unable to honor lost loved ones in traditional ways. But with adversity comes innovation, and mourning rituals are an exceptional way to help us heal from the pain of loss.

At Fox Monuments, we’ll continue to support Long Island’s Jewish community throughout any future challenges. In addition, we’ll also keep creating memorials that are beautiful reflections of Jewish lives and legacies.

 

Paying respects to the elderly is one of the key values that Judaism teaches. When people pass away, it’s important for family members and friends to honor their memory and time on this earth appropriately — both when visiting the Jewish monument and on holidays.

The Jewish mourning and burial process is coordinated to help family members grieving a loss overcome this grief in a manner synonymous with their faith. Because of this, the funeral and burial normally take place immediately after death. In this blog post, we’ll discuss standard Jewish funeral etiquette, and how you can best comfort grieving friends or family after burial with the Jewish monument.

How Should You Dress for a Jewish Funeral?

Like other funeral principles, dressing appropriately is a crucial part of showing your respect for the loss. Traditionally, people attending a Jewish funeral wore only black clothing. However, over the years some families have grown more lax with regard to this policy. When attending a Jewish funeral, men should generally wear a suit, or slacks with a button-down shirt. While the clothing doesn’t necessarily need to be black, it should be a darker color.

Wearing a head covering is also a sign of respect. Most temples have yarmulkes (or skull caps) available for mourners who don’t have their own. Women, on the other hand, should also dress in darker colors. Suits are a common choice, as are skirts, blouses, and conservative dresses. The customs for funeral attire can vary depending on the house of worship and mourning family. If you’re curious about what’s appropriate, contact a member of the family or somebody close to them. The same rules apply to the unveiling ceremony.

 

 

General Funeral Conduct Tips

In Judaism, cemetery etiquette is paramount. So, be sure to arrive early, or at the very least, on time. Arriving late can be a distraction for others in attendance. Also, be sure to remain silent and don’t talk during a Jewish funeral.

While you should offer words of condolence, be sure that you’re not speaking out of turn. For example, if someone is reciting a reading or leading those gathered in the Kaddish prayer, then take care to remain silent. The same rules also apply to people who are near the Jewish monument.

 

Show Support During the Shiva

While separate from the funeral service itself, the shiva is another integral part of the Jewish mourning process. Once the deceased individual has been buried, the family proceeds to the Shiva home.

The Shiva is a time for distant family members, friends, and neighbors to pay their respects. Comforting the family and sharing pleasant stories about the deceased can go a long way in helping them overcome grief.

 

Jewish Monuments

Paying attention to these customs can go a long way in having a respectful presence. At Fox Monuments, our team’s committed to creating high-quality memorials that remain an enduring tribute to your loved one for many years to come.